Poems by our good friend 'Anon'.
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When I Am Eighteen.

When I am eighteen
I'll paint my nose green
And sing all night in the park
I'll bury my kite
And I'll pick a fight
With an imitation shark

When I'm twenty nine
I'll wear a big sign
Made of straw and eels and grunge
I'll juggle with crumpets
I'll play seven trumpets
and I'll clean my teeth with a sponge

When I'm forty two
I'll fly a kazoo
From the top of a mountain peak
I'll balance a hose
On the end of my nose
And I won't have a wash for a week

When I'm old as the hills
I'll look back on the thrills
That I had in my life and tell tales
Of the terrible jokes
That I played with egg yolks
and a small suitcase full of nails



Hollywood.

Hollywood stars today
go through life
buying
furniture shops
worm charming
rolling pin throwing
snail racing
iron ball throwing
porridge-making
toe wrestling
sedan chair carrying
Don't wash, then sleep on
Strawberry and fresh smoked trout
for a week

Wee Willie Winkie.

Wee Willie Winkie
Runs through the town
Upstairs and downstairs
In his three door hatchback.



As Sad As...

I'm as sad as an odd sock
with no one to wear it
as sad as a birthday
with no one to share it
as sad as a teddy
with no one to care for it

as sad as a firework
with no one to light it
as sad as a strawberry
with no one to bite it
as sad as a grey day
with no sun to lighten it

as sad as a bonfire
with no one to poke it
as sad as a puppy
with no one to stroke it
as sad as a promise
when somebody broke it.


Pancake

Our class made a pancake
with finely-ground flour
and cheese and tomatoes
wrapped in it.
It had a crinkly edge
with lots of little holes
for the steam to escape.
Then Billy knocked the whole lot over
but our teacher rescued it
Then we cooked it under a flame
and put it in the fridge for later.
It was a real work of art.
It was our
milled, filled, frilled, drilled, spilled, grilled, chilled, skilled pancake



The Cherry of Life.

Life is like a cherry
Sweet, with a hard stone inside
Life is a damp patch on the carpet
That mum tries to hide
Life is like a door that is locked -
When you find the key you can enter the garden
Life is a bar of lemming-scented soap
Life is the name of the game
and I want to play the game with you.